Friday, September 27, 2013

Separation anxiety......Oh No!

We have smoothly moved house. The mover was a great help to ease our burden. The eight big hunks used two days to pack, moved, unpack and organize all our furniture and belongings from the old house to new house. We practically only need to pack the more important and personal belongings into the luggage and transport them ourselves.

When we finally felt like 'settling down' after the move, 17-month-old Jaden went through a big change that caught me off guard.

From a cheerful and adorable baby boy, he turned into an ever-crying Koala, which constantly clinging to a tree. And unfortunately, I was the chosen tree. The worst thing is, he would only stop crying whenever he was in my arms.

Looking that he was down with flu a few days before our move, I sought help from my mum to come down from Penang to look after Jaden before letting him enrolling into the playgroup in Cherie Hearts.

Refused to eat and drink, Jaden practically cried non-stop (except sleeping time) when I was out for work. On working days, he would lie down at the main entrance to block the path knowing that I would pass through that door to go out to work.

A few days down the road, he lost his voice from over crying. After seeing a pediatrician at the neighborhood,  Jaden was said to be physically healthy, thus the only possible problem remained was 'unable to adapt to the new environment'. Time, is the best and only remedy in this case. So, mums out there please do not over estimate a toddler's ability in adapting to the new environment! Moving house and changing care taker is a big event to the little man!

The nightmare continued like never ending until we accidentally discovered that letting him watching his own videos helped to calm him down. This guy liked to watch himself!

I did not know how did my mum suffer whenever I was at work. I only know that carrying him excessively had caused back pain and severed my varicose vein.

After a three-week- long torture for everyone in the house, Jaden's condition began to improve. Crying became less and his appetite gradually recovered. His exhausted grandmother was 'released' back to hometown and this marked the beginning of another challenge for the little boy, enrolling to the Playgroup.

To help him face another new change in his life, I took a week's leave from work to make sure he was all right in the Playgroup.

First day was not a good one. I stayed with him for half an hour before leaving him to his teacher and his peers. Unable to get used to the daily routine in the Playgroup, he cried. It took me so long to calm him down when I visited him in the noon. I called it a day for him and took him home.

On the second and third day, he was able to eat and sleep according to the schedule of the group. Of course, he still cried on and off whenever he though of me. I picked him back at three and five respectively. I could never forget the happiness in his face every time he saw me appearing to 'rescue' him from school.

I am yet to find out what happen to him today, the 4th day.

Early childhood experts said that kids will outgrow the phase of separation anxiety by themselves.

The truth is no matter how calm and positive I know I should be, there is constantly a sense of guilt deep in my heart to see him being 'forced' to grow up at such a young age. I believe I am sharing the silence pain of many working mothers out there.